I don’t really make New Year’s resolutions, but as I was saying good-bye to 2013 I did think, “If I were going to make one resolution for 2014, what would it be?” What one thing would I be committed to doing above all other things?
Most of the resolutions that we set are just goals, and most often goals that fall by the wayside because we’re not willing to make the changes they require of us. How do I know this? When we are really ready to make a change, we do it at whatever moment we feel inspired to make the change, because we are emotionally ready to make the change our head thinks we should make. Ironically those changes usually happen in an instant. For example, I’d pondered giving up red meat for years. Occasionally I’d try to do it, but I always went back to eating red meat. Then one day several years ago I was watching something on the news and from that moment on, I gave up red meat with minimal difficulty. Why? I was ready to make the change. Most resolutions don’t work because we’re trying to force ourselves to change a behavior we emotionally don’t want to change at this time because our emotions don’t care if it’s January 1. When you’re ready, you’ll make the changes you want or need to accomplish.
However, in the spirit of resolutions, it occurred to me that there is really only one resolution worth having, ever. It’s being resolved to be a better person each day. Sounds simple. But the truth is, when we’re trying to be a better person each day, we are asking ourselves to move beyond instant gratification. Or, one might say, instant happiness.
Being a better person might involve:
- Choosing not to speak your mind just because a thought crosses it.
- Picking foods that are good for your body, not just your taste buds.
- Doing the right thing even if it’s not the convenient thing.
- Learning new things.
- Setting boundaries to have a balanced life.
- Giving more than you think you can.
- Being compassionate instead of judgmental.
- Embracing change.
- Being disciplined.
You get the idea – it’s about rising above what’s easy and doing what makes us better.
I’m not going to go resolution crazy, but I am going to try to look back at the end of each day this year, and see if I did at least something better than I did the day before. And, if I’m lucky and persist, by the end of the year I’ll have developed a few new good habits that made me a better person.
[Tweet “The ONLY New Year’s Resolution: Rising ABOVE what’s easy & doing what makes us BETTER”]
What do you think about New Year’s resolutions?
Everyone who comments by January 11, 2014 will entered into a drawing for a Society T-shirt.
My dad always had a saying that has stayed with me long after he has gone…”In every way and every day, I am getting better and better”…and he lived those words as I try to do, too!! Happy New Year!!
Your dad sounds wise …
I agree that we won’t change until we are emotionally ready.. sometimes you are just “in the mood”, and then it isn’t so hard
Change is so much easier when we want to do it … to bade we don’t reach that spot more often … LOL
This has been my work for the past five years: to be a better person than I was the day before. I don’t set useless new year’s resolutions. I set a daily goal to be better than I was yesterday. Thanks for letting me know I’m not the only one who does this.
Max sounds like we’re almost peas in a pod … Happy 2014!
Sometimes I think I need a filter between my thoughts and my mouth, but I try really hard to think before speaking, ALWAYS…. Thanks for the post.
That’s a challenge one for me … but I usually think, does my comment really make a difference and if it doesn’t it’s easier to just smile.
Happy new year and thanks for sharing this post. I do agee with you, for me too this year is about looking at how I can make my quality of life better than the previous years by developing regular habits which will help me.
We’ll be improving together … Happy 2014!!!
The only resolution I can make is to be the best me I can be. That means doing what I can to make life easier for those around me. If we all try to make it easier for someone, then all of it would be easier for all of us.
Patricia what a beautiful philosophy that would make the world a better place. Thanks for living the philosophy.
Through the years I have found that breaking resolutions into small parts helps me to make changes but also I gain a sense of satisfaction when I look back and see, that indeed, I have accomplished quite a bit. I have what I call “Cam’s Monthly Book” … each month I fill out a sheet with various categories, i.e. reading, household projects, volunteering with week to week goals. For me (a list maker) it has worked well throughout the years.
Cam I love the Monthly Book … we’d all be so much happier if we celebrated what we did accomplish, not just think about what we want to accomplish.
What a very good article … I’ve been working on this list for myself this past six months or so and the only thing I would add to your list for myself would be to set a good example for my daughters to learn by so they can live a healthier, and thus, happier life. Thank you and I wish you a kind and happy new year!!
Your daughters are lucky to have you set the example you are … Happy 2014!!!
Your posts on FB always make me think and shift my lifestyle to something I would rather be. Even when I think I’m all I can be I find there is more out there for me to fulfill.
Caryn thanks for reading the post. Have a Happy 2014!!!
I like this! I like to think we all do the best we can at our current level of understanding. Giving this some conscious attention sounds good. Less than half an hour ago, I started a gratitude list that I intend to add to daily. I like what Cam Cambun wrote and also Maureen Tucker. Maureen, in the 1870’s in Europe, Dr. Emile Coue was one of the first people to explore the power of auto suggestion. Although his medical clinic was achieving recovery rates of up to five times faster than any other similar medical facility, his method was so simple it was not accepted as valid for a long time. He taught each of his patients to say “Every day, in every way, I’m feeling better and better.”
Karen practicing daily gratitude is a wonderful new year habit 🙂 Happy 2014!!!
This is such a fabulous resolution Pamela!! I think that if everyone just tried to do this more often than not, everything else would simply fall right into place 🙂
Wishing you a blessed and beautiful 2014!!
Rose, thank you and have a wonderful 2014 too!!!
Wonderful! Mine for this year is to help at least one person in a new way each and everyday! I am going out of my way to help the elderly as they are near and dear to my heart!
Awe that inspires me. When we give to others it just comes back to us. You’ll have a very happy 2014!!!
Learning to say no without feeling guilty and the need to explain twhy.
Love it Mary … No is a happy word :-).
I live my life treating those around me the way I want to be treated. I make mistakes but I know I can start all over everyday.
Each day is a new beginning as they say. You have a great philosophy of treating other like you want to be treated. Makes the world much happier. Enjoy 2014!!!
Enjoyed the article. This year I will need to embrace change and continue to do the best I can.
Change is a process every day … congrats on embracing it. Happy 2014!!!
Resolutions: a lot like eating an elephant
one bite at a time!! No in all seriousness, this blog, the Facebook page too, is really aspirational and encouraging. I know I have a long way to go, as I am fighting my way back after losing myself in a deeply unhappy marriage. Yesterday i became free of that, but I have done a lot of self-awareness and mindfulness ‘work’ in the last 18 months that it has taken to get through the divorce.
Blessings to you for all you do
I feel blessed to be part of your journey … congratulations on moving forward to a happy life in 2014!
My one resolution: Every night before bed, share my happy thought of the day with my husband.
I hate to admit how often it’s the same happy thing, but so what – it makes me HAPPY!
I think that New Years Resolutions are easily broken, but life style changes have more power. This year I made a change to not let anyone steal my happiness. I am a nurturer…being a door mat is second nature to my existence. I have in the past empowered people to steal my light…I do not do that any longer. I have 31 types of happiness on my office door. I am HAPPY. My resolution in 2013 is to wake up each day wanting to be a better person than I was the day before. Waking up is a blessing, and It is always a happy day in NW Indiana for me.
I think that New Years Resolutions are easily broken, but life style changes have more power. This year I made a change to not let anyone steal my happiness. I am a nurturer…being a door mat is second nature to my existence. I have in the past empowered people to steal my light…I do not do that any longer. I have 31 types of happiness on my office door. I am HAPPY. My resolution in 2014 is to wake up each day wanting to be a better person than I was the day before. Waking up is a blessing, and It is always a happy day in NW Indiana for me.
This was my exact “resolution” this year, being BETTER every day!