Chaos barges its way into our day when it sends us an unexpected situation that redefines the next few minutes, the next few hours or days, and on occasion even a lifetime.
There are two types of chaos … controllable and uncontrollable.
Controllable chaos includes situations like:
- Coaching your child’s peewee soccer team. If you’re part of the crowd containment for ten four- year-olds, there’s always an expected element of the unexpected. This type of chaos can even be fun.
- You work for a marketing firm and a major potential client wants to see a new campaign within 48 hours, so it’s all hands on deck to get the creative wheels rolling to deliver a polished presentation.
- Your wedding has 300 guests and even the best laid plans will never be picture-perfect, so something you didn’t plan for will create a memorable moment of chaos.
While technically controllable chaos isn’t really controllable, it’s in situations where you’re expecting the unexpected. Therefore the chaos is usually manageable.
Uncontrollable chaos includes situations like:
- The Boston Marathon bombing – totally unexpected and life-altering for many.
- The fertilizer plant that exploded in West, Texas – again, not expected and life-altering.
- Weather disasters that destroy homes and businesses.
- Serious illnesses, when you or someone you love or take care of is ill.
- Loss of income.
Unless we always walk around being pessimistic, which most of you don’t, these situations happen unexpectedly and require us to adjust our lives within minutes.
How we respond to the chaos determines our happiness. Numerous studies have confirmed that a happy and unhappy person each experiences about the same amount of unhappy situations. It’s their attitude about the situations that defines their happiness, not the situation itself.
It’s true, and perhaps even unfair, that some people are more genetically inclined to find the silver linings in dark clouds. They are probably naturally happier in all situations, including chaotic ones. However, our perspective is something that each of us can decide to change, and at any moment. If you don’t like how you perceive something, you can change it because it’s all about how you think. How we think about a situation is completely within our control.
Therefore, it’s possible to coexist with both controllable and uncontrollable chaos without losing all of your happiness. Maybe not in the initial moments when a situation rears its chaotic head – you may need to get mad, cry or be sad. But within a short amount of time you have the power to decide if you’re going to seek the silver lining or let the negative elements of the chaos define your attitude.
Would you like to learn 5 simple ideas to help you stay happier despite chaos? Join us on Saturday, May 4 for a FREE webinar: 5 Ways to Keep Your Happy in a Chaotic World.
If you register but can’t attend you’ll get a link to a recording that will be available for a limited time.
Written by Pamela Gail
Pamela Gail Johnson founded the Society of Happy People in 1998.
The Society is grounded on Pamela’s four key Practical Happiness Principles:
Pamela identified 31 Types of Happiness that are on the SOHP App Happiness Counter to make it easier to recognize moments of happiness.
Pamela also plans and organizes the Society of Happy People's annual happiness celebrations:
She's also a speaker, trainer, and author.
A few of her personal smile starters include her monthly book club, yoga, traveling and meeting new happy people.